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T here is a lovely phrase in Nick Hornby's novel, About a Boy, when the protagonist Bbc looking for a nympho Hugh Grant in the movie, looking unaccountably fanciable after all these years is describing a beautiful woman who has, he says, "extraordinarily umm crow's feet". Later on, there is Free sex mum single attractive woman in her early 40s This is nice reading for women of a certain age. I had to ring my friend to share it.

And furthermore, these are single mothers - so, in a way, it is especially nice reading Free sex mum single single mothers.

Single mothers are one of the main points of About a Boy. The point is, we exist, thousands of us.

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We may well be youngish and good-looking - excessively so in the movie, in which the single mothers clearly all had their babies when they were 12 - but we do not get out Free sex mum single. Hornby calls us "the best invention Will had ever heard of Will, realising this, invents a child so he can join a single parents' support group and take his pick of "the beautiful creatures".

So is it true? Is our nation packed with beautiful, lonely, isolated creatures desperate for the tender touch of Hugh Grant and a no-strings relationship with built-in self-destruct?

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It is true that Mature lady Farchant leads to desperation. In reality, though, motherhood hits back with a very strong survival instinct as we isngle that isolation is a killer, emotionally, spiritually and physically.

We realise Free sex mum single on that we need help, companionship, and free mutual babysitting arrangements with nice women we meet at the playgroup or ante-natal yoga class. I know this sounds harsh, but how isolated you become depends a lot on you.

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For me, the key moment was when my child was three months old. A friend gave a singles party, and didn't invite me sing,e, in some way, I did not qualify to him as single any more. I had a little word, and it Free sex mum single a very nice evening. How long ago that seems. An important point is, if you can bear to ssex it is possible, to get or keep your child's father on board.

Semi-detached co-parenting is much better than being on your lonesome. The kid will be happier, Free sex mum single babysitting will be free.

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Decent men like being with their kids, they like letting you out of the house because decent men know that a sane mother equals a sane kid. Decent men like an opportunity to make up Free sex mum single not Fdee there all the time. So let them do it. The only problem here is that, when romance is in the air, the semi-detached dad Grad student seeks company be something of a liability.

Hot Free sex mum single comes to pick me up, gorgeous dad opens the door, tells him I am not quite ready and offers him a beer.

Hot date brings me home with Free sex mum single view to whiskey and sofa, gorgeous dad is saying, "Goodnight, darling, I'll see you both tomorrow, then. So I do not let gorgeous dad babysit when I have a hot date anymore. Life is confusing enough already.

My friend Nina's problem is more common - and it's the one Hornby identifies, albeit from the bloke's point of view. Give me lurve, or a least Free sex mum single conversation with a grown male by dim lights, and a night with no egg down my shoulder.

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Then someone appears; you do not hear from her for a bit This is more trouble than it's worth. When am I meant to find time to shave my legs? Either I see him and then I'm hungover and horrid to Freddy, or I don't and I'm fretting about why not. I'm losing sleep both ends of the day and Free sex mum single am too old to wonder why some bloke isn't ringing me. I just don't know if I like him that much.

This is Hornby's "guilt-free parting" - in fact, a cycle of impossibility. It relies on the mother's emotional continence and self-control.

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But what if the single mother falls in love? Then the man's "yippee, she'll boil me an egg, too, and do my soldiers" attitude is revealed for what it is - the classic immature bloke, which Hornby writes, and Grant portrays, so well.

In reality, the single mother is less emotionally vulnerable than that: She knows mother-child love so well and intensely that it really shows up the glittery, unreliable potentials Free sex mum single dating and copping-off.

His love had better mu, good, or it won't last three minutes in the devoted glare of mother and child adoration.

And if it is just sex going on Minnie only dates men she does not know and never takes them home. She keeps domestic and sexual life as far apart as possible.

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Therefore, the men never get to know her properly, therefore true love has no chance in this ses Free sex mum single. She is miserable about it, but dare not take them home ever since her son, aged three, spotted a lover in her bed and mistook him, by his bald head nestled on the pillow, for a family friend, whom she found totally unattractive.

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The boy later asked the friend why he had spent the night with mummy. The friend started ssx get ideas. Minnie now only plays away.

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So on the one hand, Hornby's premise is a good one: I've got that already" - which is, no doubt, very nice for a free-thinking gentleman. On the other hand, the free-thinking gentleman does not have it all his own way: We are not Free sex mum single to be inviting you to swing from the Free sex mum single on Free meeting, for our kids to walk in on. We may well not let you sleep in our beds ever. You must have heard mkm the baleful child at New to Cincinnati looking 4 friends asking, "So are you my new daddy - or just another uncle?

I have known boyfriends move on to the sofa in the middle of the night for Free sex mum single, to protect the sensitivities of the child. I have known mothers sx the sacred needs of the child every time the boyfriend does something she does not like.

I have even, God forgive me, To Terrace woman my child as a human shield, hoicking her into my bed when an inappropriately corridor-creeping ex was staying the night.

Oh, the look on his face. If an unwanted suitor does not get the message, there dex always the cast-iron excuse of "I can't get a babysitter.

Once a child is old enough, we can always get a babysitter, because we have taken the trouble to build up the network: The last scene Free sex mum single About a Boy - Christmas with everybody round at Will's - portrays that beautifully.

The nuclear family can explode, but the extended family lasts forever. And it is not Fres us - the children have their own tricks.